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Where all the Greek Women at?

April 11, 2005

About this time every year we usually devote a column to one of our favorite Greek extra-curricular activities, the 16-team, 13-week spectacle of Greek League. This isn’t one of those columns. Well, not really. The only reason we mention Greek League is to illustrate that for 13 straight weeks on Sunday afternoons in February, March and April, you have up to 150 Greek guys passing through the doors of St. Katherine’s gym to play with another 32 Philhellenes spread across these rosters. Still dozens of others, guys and girls included, come to watch, making this the largest gathering of Greek young adults outside of a Greek Night during the late winter and early spring. Our question is, what’s the equivalent for Greek girls in DC? We’re not necessarily talking about a Girls Greek League. (Such a league will hopefully be a reality in the near future, will accomplish many great things and the women in the league will play in it for a variety of reasons, which may or may not address what we're talking about in this article for many of the Greek girls out there.  But this is not an article about basketball.) We’re talking about any event or some other organized effort that brings that many Greek girls together for even a few weeks during the year.

What would such an event for Greek girls be? Is there something that Greek girls would do with each other en masse that would happen regardless of whether there were Greek guys there at all? (This is to exclude Greek Night, which wouldn’t happen without Greek guys. By the way, have you ever met a Greek girl Greek Night promoter? That’s a subject for another column at another time.) We imagine that Greek girls are already as overscheduled as a 7-year-old child rarely falling victim to the trifecta of guy downtime activities -- sports, television, and watching sports on television. So anything that would keep a Greek girl’s attention span long enough to foster any sort of Greek girl only mass attendance has to be intriguing enough and worth her time to bump something else off her schedule. (Is it some sort of yoga class? A book club? Belly dance lessons? Who knows?)

We wonder if there is any sort of demand for this type of Greek girl only en masse activity? For example, many of the guys who play in Greek League play basketball with other Greek guys outside of the league and its not like many of them are playing in leagues or on other nights with non-Greeks. It’s something about the playing against other Greeks that makes these guys come out. Is there something that Greek girls would do with each other en masse that they wouldn’t do with other girls, or not find as enjoyable?

You’re probably asking the question, why would The Guys @ DCGreeks.com or any Greek guy for that matter care about whether such Greek Girl only en masse events exist? By definition no Greek guy would be invited, expected, or desired at such an event. But the overall health and strength of the Greek community here in DC could benefit from such an endeavor. Like the purported benefits of single-sex education in high school and sororities in college, the theory is that such an effort would get Greek girls, particularly those who are new to the area to participate and remain in the community. One of the reasons often cited by Greek girls for not being active in the Greek community here or wherever they may live, is of course the quality or qualities of the Greek guys in the area, but just as likely to turn a Greek girl off to the community are other Greek girls themselves. Especially if her first and only exposure to the community is a Greek Night, Greek girls walk into a seemingly competitive, often-times intimidating world of girls dressing less to impress guys, girls showing off ridiculously toned abs and fake tans, again to impress guys, and girls flocking in tightly knit, almost impenetrable circles (literally and figuratively) to keep other girls away. This perception may not always be entirely accurate. These girls could deep down be the biggest sweethearts you’d ever meet, but it takes an environment where Greek girls could actually get to know each other to discover if this is actually the case. Again, Greek Night is not this environment.  A few of these Greek girl mass attendance experiences would allow them to let their guard down amongst each other, so the next time they are in one of these “competitive” environments, they’d realize that they’re among friends and have more in common than they think.

(Wait a minute, what am I saying? Competition among Greek girls is the only reason Greek guys ever seem attractive or interesting to Greek girls. The more Greek girls start talking, the quicker they’ll realize that we’re really not worth all the trouble they put into getting and keeping our attention. Soon turtlenecks will replace low-cut tops, khakis will replace tight black pants, and that look that Greek girls have when they pretend that they’re ignoring or don’t notice Greek guys won’t be pretend anymore. And then we’ve single-handedly not only ended up destroying the Greek Night industry, but the future of the Greek-American race. Ladies, forget ever having read this article. Continue to only hang out with each other when other Greek guys are around. Don’t discuss your feelings. Don’t talk amongst yourselves. Don’t tell each other what you really think of Greek guys.)


Read past feature articles.