The
Daily Gyro
Updated
Daily on
Greek Time
April 6, 2005
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Vanity Fair reports that Aristotle Onassis’ granddaughter, Athina Roussel, is
set to marry some Brazilian lawn-jockey, er, showjumper, named Alvaro “Doda”
Neto in Sao Paolo on December 3rd. Neto who is 12 years older than
Roussel, left his baby daughter and her mother for perhaps the world’s richest
Greek girl. Sounds more like his nickname should be “Dodo,” or “Kevin
Federline.”
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Recent television ads in Greece are promoting home ownership and mortgages by
portraying landlords as shady racist sexists. The landlords in these ads are
shown asking questions such as, “Do you have foreign friends that aren’t
European?,” “Do you wear high heels?,” "What do you mean, you work at night?"
If you believe these ads, Greek landlords must assume that potential renters
are either refugee smugglers or hookers.
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The Greek Centre for the Treatment of Wild Animals released over a dozen
rehabilitated birds this week including six pelicans, four hawks, two petrels,
and a rare eagle that visits Greece only in winter. Most of the birds were
injured by shotgun fire, while three were poisoned by drinking toxic
substances. In a related story, your drunk Theo Yianni called to tell you to
pick him up at the airport tomorrow.
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Both Greek and FYROMian sources are reporting that the countries are working
towards settling on a name for Greece’s northern neighbor. Possible compromise
names include “Slavic Macedonia” and “Macedonia-Skopje.” Perhaps both countries
should keep an eye on the deal that will be made in the coming days for naming
rights to RFK Stadium (the temporary home of the Washington Nationals), which
also will try to in-artfully add verbiage to preserve vestiges of the existing
name. (FYROM would be smarter and do more for its economy to auction off
temporary naming rights on eBay like was done with the current home of the
Boston Celtics.) If Greek Diplomats are willing to allow the word Macedonia to
appear in FYROM’s new moniker, we’d like the following names to be up for
consideration:
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I Can’t Believe It's Not Macedonia.
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Not-Greece Macedonia
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Macedonia, Presented by (insert name of telecom, financial services, or failing
dot.com here.)
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Smooth Mint Skopje (ok, we know it doesn’t include Macedonia, but we couldn’t
resist.)
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04/04/2005
04/01/2005
03/30/2005
03/28/2005
03/25/2005
03/23/2005
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